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The Condition of Our Soul

shgadwashgadwa Raw Newbie

If anyone wants to talk about this, I for myself, would appreciate it. I will give you my testimony (as a believer) and I would ask you to give me your testimony (as an atheist).

For my testimony, please assume that God is real. That is the way it is worded. We can doubt that later.

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  • shgadwashgadwa Raw Newbie

    I was raised Christian. I feel very blessed to have been raised in a Godly home. I was baptized when I was 8 years old and I then accepted Jesus into my heart as my personal Lord and savior. Looking back, I know that I REALLY meant it. I wanted to get baptized. Even though I did not fully know or understand what it meant and the sacrifice I would have to make.

    Since being baptized in water, I remember feeling overflowed with God’s Love, with his spirit. It was filling me, bring me peace. If you guys have not felt this experience, let me say that it is not the love, as in you love someone, this is far different. Far greater.

    But over time my desire faded and I started having problems. It started with me fighting with my brothers and sisters and although many say this is normal, I beg to differ. I did not want to hurt others, but it was something about me that I would easily let my anger get out of control. I shortly became rebellious and disobedient, and a liar.

    Not too long after, when I was about 13 years old, I learned about masturbation and started getting online to watch porn. I became more and more wicked (through God’s eyes). I had some nasty thoughts and did some really bad things.

    Now, deep down inside, I really wanted to serve Jesus. I was so afraid. Yet, I did not want others to know that I had this problem or problem(s). So, I kept it to myself. I went around acting like I was saved, like I was born again, but I was not. I had fallen away. I lied to people. Every time my dad would get worried about how I was doing, I would lie and say I am going good. I basically, would cry out to God that he would deliver me, but I did it in secret and hid from people we know that could pray for me that I would be delivered. I was afraid.

    After being prayed for by one brother in the Lord, I was delivered for a short time…but alter went back to my old ways (Jesus talks about this as well). But after praying and repenting and really really crying out to God and also having a couple people pray for me, Jesus came and saved me and delivered me from all of that.

    I have not struggled with lust, or porn or masturbation, or the desire to get every girl I knew pregnant…. in well over a year and Jesus is renewing me day by day.

  • shgadwashgadwa Raw Newbie

    OK….. now that I have given you guys my testimony, please give me yours (as to why/how you are an atheist).

    Also, points that are in books, videos, articles online that you believe in…...

    I would like to know more about your beliefs and I welcome anyone to respond to this.

  • geniusrawmodel23geniusrawmodel23 Raw Newbie

    Wow, that’s really truthful. I congratulate you on being strong enough to tell everyone about this. Congratulations on conquering it. I know how hard it is to overcome sin. I myself am a Catholic. My beliefs are pretty similar to Christian beliefs, just some things are different.

  • wow, shgadwa. I’m crying right now… your testimony is almost the same as mine, except I also got caught up in homosexuality. thank you for being such a strong voice on these forums. you’re a blessing and encouragement. God Bless

  • TomsMomTomsMom Raw Newbie

    superkat92, you ARE a Christian if you are Catholic:-)

  • shgadwashgadwa Raw Newbie

    Christian, by man’s definition, is that you believe in Jesus. Or So I think. So, catholics are technically Christian, this does not mean that they are or are not, saved however.

  • shgadwashgadwa Raw Newbie

    superkat92,

    It was not me that conquered it. I tried on my own to conquer it for YEARS. It was God that delivered me. And I owe him all the glory.

  • TomsMomTomsMom Raw Newbie

    shgadwa, you are not educated well and are misguided. It’s really not worth it to try to debate theology with me.

  • beanybeeganbeanybeegan Raw Newbie

    shgadwa

    I would like to thank you for speaking up. I to am a believer in Jesus the Son of God. I too am saved, by the blood of Jesus.When I was 7 the doctors said I had leukemia. Those of the church prayed for me and because of the stripes that were put upon Jesus back I was healed. This is only one of many reasons of why I am a believer in the name of Jesus.

    Now that we have all spoken up. I feel it is time to get back to food and health. We all have our beliefs. Alix1962 Jesus said to tell. He would do the rest. Christians are not on this world to debate or argue. To all the Atheist and Agnostics and Christians. We will all know the truth when we die. So now lets get back to Gone Raw.
  • This struck me as a strange question. “Why are you an athiest?” Everyone is born an athiest and generally naturally becomes an agnostic at some point. An athiest is someone who either is not converted to christianity, or someone who has at one time been converted to christianity and then became dissalusioned with christianity for one reason or another. Usually the reason is because of contact with christians that are not living according to the teachings of the Bible.

  • shgadwa- don’t get me wrong, I am not against your zeal. I am glad that you have found freedom from the bondage of sin. However, just like Victoria Boutenko had to learn not to run after fat women to tell them about raw, you need to learn not to run after zealous athiest to tell them about the love of Christ. There is a whole world full of people that are athiest and they are not saying anything about it because they do not think about it. Some of them would love to be converted to christianity, but it is more important to talk to them like they are a fellow human, not a devil or something! After all, most athiest are not even interested in the devil or whether or not thier lifestyle is concidered sinful to you.

  • shgadwashgadwa Raw Newbie

    pulse,

    I think you are a Christian….right?

    I am sorry….I am not meaning to talk to atheists like they are the devil but I appreciate you saying this.

    First, lets get down to the root issue, I have problems. Because Jesus has saved me, that does not make me problem-free. If anyone here notices my problem(s), I want to know more about it because I WANT TO CHANGE.

    You did not come out like you were against me. Thank you.

    But, what you are saying, is true.

  • daniefondaniefon Raw Newbie

    Pulse,

    “An athiest is someone who either is not converted to christianity, or someone who has at one time been converted to christianity and then became dissalusioned with christianity for one reason or another. Usually the reason is because of contact with christians that are not living according to the teachings of the Bible.

    If I am reading your definition correctly, then Jews are atheists, Muslims are atheists, Buddhists are atheists…...........

  • Blue_EyesBlue_Eyes Raw Master

    isnt athiest just one without a “religion” so to speak so then jew, muslims and others are religions so really wouldnt Pulse really just be trying to say religion where she said christiantiy maybe??? Sorry Pulse not trying to put words in your mouth. I really havent delt with any other than christians but ya know I just want to be who I am and not have to deal with what others think I should be. Just accept each other as people. no one has a clue to what is real so until you die and come back and tell me what is really on the other side (please be gone for more than a few weeks) do not condemn or try to convert me I will see the world the way I do if something changes for me thats ok if not thats ok too.

  • daniefondaniefon Raw Newbie

    a·the·ist –noun a person who denies or disbelieves the existence of a supreme being or beings

    from dictionary.reference.com

  • Good point, daniefon. I was referring to the reason that an athiest is an athiest and failed to mention that conversion can take place to spiritual beliefs other than christianity. Thanks for fleshing that out for me.

    shgadwa- Yes, I am a christian, at least I try to be. I am glad that you said that you want to change because I do not believe that someone can be truely christian without a change, and not just a change, but daily change. You are a teen, I am midlifer, we are both at one of those times in life that will naturally try our faith. But it can be the best thing for you if you keep pushing through to find that change that will lead to a total separation from your past. Not so much of your past sin, but of your sin nature! I guess I really just want to say that I feel that there is a whole ton of cleanup to do in the christian faith among fellow christians, and you may be better served to start there. I did watch most of the video you recomended. The speaker is spot on other than the fact that he never mentioned that the Bible says that conversion occurs at the point of new birth with the evidence of speaking in other toungs! Up until that point a christian really struggles to actually change.

  • shgadwashgadwa Raw Newbie

    Yes, paul washer is a true prophet and he has helped me a lot…. this is why I have given others the links. I want them to be blessed.

    Yes, I am disgusted at sin. I hate it. But God is good and he is working.

    However, not every one that the Lord saves, or gives the holy spirit to, will speak in tongues. I believe the bible talks about this…..

  • Thanks for the definition, daniefon. Here is the one for agnostic- Someone who disclaims any knowledge of God, but does not deny the possiblility of his existence.

  • shgadwashgadwa Raw Newbie

    Blue Eyes,

    I do not condemn you. I have quickly learned that the only thing I can do for you is pray for you and you are in my prayers…..

    If God is real, he will convert you. I do not need to preach at you unless you want to hear the Gospel.

  • geniusrawmodel23geniusrawmodel23 Raw Newbie

    shgadwa—yes, that’s true. Everything we “overcome” is all thanks to God and His wonderful mercy and love. Alix- actually, the Catholic religion was originally called Christian. But Martin Luther and King James all the rest of them screwed everything up by taking the parts of the scripture that they liked and discarding those that they did not. Therefore, although I am technically christian also, I prefer to say that I am Catholic to distinguish from the zillions of different kinds of Christians.

  • John 3 : 5 & 6 Jesus answered, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born of water and of the spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh: and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.

    This is what Nicodemus was told by Jesus. Nicodemus was an undercover believer. John 7:37-39 deals with the promise of the Spirit. Luke 24:44-53 promise of power. Then all through Acts you see the promise given multiple times.

  • shgadwashgadwa Raw Newbie

    Well, I do realize the name for the topic might have been a little wrong…..

  • shgadwashgadwa Raw Newbie

    Pulse, I was not denying that you had to be baptized. Was that what you thought?

    Good verse. Very good verse.

  • elizabethhelizabethh Raw Newbie

    shgadwa…how is this relevant to raw food? there are plenty of internet forums designed specifically for religious debate. i think that would be a more appropriate place for a topic like this, so i won’t bother to post an argumentative response.

  • shgadwashgadwa Raw Newbie

    Thank you elizabeth.

    Personally, I believe that our condition, spiritually, the condition of our souls, is much more important than health and raw food….but you can believe differently.

    I will look up some more forums….

    Got to go right now.

  • shgadwa- No, I was not talking about baptism although it is part of conversion, I was talking about becoming a new creature in Christ. Taking on a new nature, where the old nature is covered with God’s nature. I am talking about a spiritual awakening in God where he fills you with his spirit as you speak in another language that you have never learned. This experience will be life changing, and exhillarating! You will feel like you are high, or drunk. I have never been high or drunk, but that is how I have heard others explain it. For me it was peace and joy that is not of this world and indeed it is not from this earth. It is the best way to experience what is “out there!” God has more for you, and until you have tried it, you may never know! You do not have to be in church. You can be alone , but all you have to do is ask in total faith and belief as you pray.

  • I also want to say that I know that some christians that will say this is of satan. I know that there is an experience that satan has copied from what the scriptures tell us about in Acts 2:38, but those who have an experience from satan enter into it in a totally different frame of mind and feel some sort of sadness, fear or dread at some point during that experience from what I have heard. The experience with Jesus that we read about in Acts 2:38 is a beautiful experience that empowers and enlightens the mind and gives a person a supernatural dose of love and wisdom in the holy ghost. I have a hard time understanding how a christian can mantain being a christian without it!

    Also, I am aware that gone raw is all about raw food. I have also heard an aweful lot about the spiritual interest that occurs as a person begins to journey into the raw lifestyle. And I can attest to this!

  • shgadwa, You know when the Lord has chosen a person, He exposes us to who we really are, WITHOUT HIM. It is the process of stripping us of our ego and self love. Self love meaning that part of us which only sees the good and brilliant side of us. What has happened to you, is a normal process in the road to God. As we were when we were children is how God created us. The basic goodness and nice things about us never go away, but really, when God chooses someone and we accept His calling and decide for Jesus and Heaven, the devil does all he can to destroy that good and to take us away from Jesus. It is hard, but when temptation comes along, just picture the devil sniggering at you and saying, “Come on. Give up your place in Heaven for a few moments of illicit sex and a few moments of physical pleasure.”

    Time stands still in Paradise and you can know that when Jesus accepted the lashings with those cruel scourges with sharp things on the end of the thongs of the whip, which tore Jesus’s flesh from His dear bones and exposed them. And when He was ridiculed and humiliated by the soldiers while putting the crown of thorns on his head which penetrated a major nerve within His head and caused Him enormous pain. And when He suffered the Crucifixion which, when the nails were forced into His wrists and went through the nerve by the wrist causing immense pain, He knew that all the people who had been given to Him by God, would suffer enormous temptations and that the fight would be hard and long, In His infinite love for us he willingly sacrificed for us. because:-

    “Love is patient. Love is kind. It is not jealous, conceited or proud. Love is not ill mannered, selfish or irritable. Love does not keep a record of wrongs. Love is not happy with evil but is happy with the truth. Love never gives up and it’s faith, hope and patience never fail. Love is eternal. 1.Cor.13:4-8

    And when we suffer with and for Jesus and God intentions :-</p>

    ”And this small and temporary trouble we suffer, will bring us a tremendous and eternal glory, much greater than the trouble.” 2.Cor:4:17

    You must think of the suffering of Jesus when you are tempted to sin. Believe me, I know through bitter experience, just what you are going through. But here is a reality. If you really want to follow Jesus, then, when a sinful thought, especially those which are totally lustful and gives you that evil leary feeling, remember that it is the devil who is acting on you at that moment.

    Think of the Passion and death of Jesus at that moment and pray, because when the devil knows that you are clinging to Jesus, He will depart and wait for your next most vulnerable moment. But stick to the thoughts of Jesus sufferings and it WILL help you to avoid sin..

    God sees what we all do at every moment. If you keep this in mind then, when you want to sin, think. ‘God is here watching me, but if I could see Him watching me, would I commit this sin in His presence?’ No of course you wouldn’t. I wish I knew this when I was in my sinuful life. It would have prevented the shame I feel when past memories flash back at me. God loves you. Look up www.medjugorje.eu go to the messages from 1981 and read what is going on in Gods world. Lots of love and prayers to you

  • shgadwashgadwa Raw Newbie

    Thank you all for that.

    Thank you bluebells. That was encouraging….

    Yes, We all really need the Lord. We need his holy spirit. This is true.

    Bluebells, if past memories of your sin flash before you, remember how Good God was and is to bring you out of it. Every time Satan reminds you of your wicked past, remind him of your holy future in the Lord. Someone else suggested this for me and it is really good.

  • shgadwa- I would like to ask you the question that Paul asked in Acts 19:1-6. Please read it and let me know your answer. You are right that we need the holy spirit. It is for everyone, not just a select few.

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