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Login Here Signup Here Signup using FacebookLately I’ve been having serious issues with convincing my parents that I want to become raw vegan.
They stress at even the thought of being a vegetarian! They call my diet not normal and that I won’t be accepted by society. I’ve done my research and explained to them my reasonings, but they keep throwing out that I’ve been “brain-washed” by the internet.
How can I convince my parents that I’d like to live this lifestyle to improve my health?
Comments
You don’t have to convince anybody of anything. It’s your life. If they don’t show you respect, don’t talk to them about it, and make this clear.
I know exactly what you mean. I don’t really feel inclined to please anyone. I’m just interested in getting a bit more respect and a lot less of a beat down every time I eat.
Citrus, I have the same problem. I am 20 and still live at home. I am moving out to California soon, and sometimes I can’t wait just so I can get away from that problem. I then realize, my family just loves me. They don’t want to see me go down the wrong path. This is just their way of protecting me. You have to let them understand that you are constantly researching health for yourself. Let them know that you are looking up information on both sides of the playing fields.
What worked for me is I asked them how much research they know on the human body. I did not do this until I knew a significant amount. In the beginning of my raw ways I was not eating healthy. I thought “anything raw is great”. That is not the truth. My brother is really into health also, so when we head butt, I always bring up great, valuable information that got him to realize I am being healthy. As soon as he realized, my parents started believing it. It is amazing how that works. A non-rawist says its okay so everyone else believes it!
I also asked my family if the monoglycerwhatever high fructose corn syrup yellow # 5 sodium benzoate propolyne glycol was meant for them to eat. That always seemed to work :)
It is very uncomfortable when you feel like you “need to hide when you eat” because “you’re doing strange things” with the food that was put here for you to consume. It is quite strange that we are pushed into this anti-social corner!
Do what’s best for you. Know your home court.
Also, its funny that we’re the “brainwashed” ones!
Treeoflife, I like what you have said. It is true, I am a mother, grandmother, and great grandmother.Most parents want what is best for there children, The one thing to understand is when they have grown up, they are still our babies. So it is hard to realize our children may know how to feed themselves better, than we feed them. I fed my children SAD and that is hard to live with.
Hi citrusgirl,
As I was growing up, I always forged my own pathway when it came to food and eating. I’ve been passionate about health since I was ten, and sure – parents will worry about your health, even if it’s not warranted. Of course they are only concerned about their baby’s well being! :) However, you may like to point out to them that if the SAD diet was healthy then we wouldn’t be seeing such an out of control obesity epidemic. Therefore, shouldn’t it be time they step away from their old mindsets and consider that this way might be better? It’s worth a try at least, you could say to them. And like Superfood said, your body is yours and the decisions you make about something so personal and yet simple as what you put in your own mouth is not for anyone else to decide. Especially given your age – you can make your own choices and stand up for them. Also point out that raw food IS accepted in society – just look at how many raw foodists, stores, restaurants, magazines, websites and products there are out there now!
Hope this helps, Fi
www.RawWayToHealth.com – for raw food recipes, chat, products, resources and more.
TreeofLife, i couldnt have put it better myself.
Just a couple things to add:
When it comes to diet, humans are THE exception – every other animal on earth is a raw foodist. The SAD diet is “not normal” especially today, with so many food additives that are basically drugs and poisons. The average male sperm count today is half of what it was in 1950. Of course there is more environmental pollution, but the food is the major factor. It’s clear: we are a dying species until we change our ways.
And this: there are a lot of people who eat high% or totally raw diets and they really arent that healthy. Many raw foodists are underweight, anemic, have thinning hair. i dont know a single raw foodist who didnt experience some negative changes in their health after going raw. many are in denial about this. If your parents already think this raw is unhealthy, then any little negative change in your health will be absolute evidence to them that raw is wrong. when i lost weight going raw, my parents (and some friends) thought i had an eating disorder. it was probably the hardest social time of my life. but like, TOL said, the care bc they love you so much.
So my advice is do your research and do some liver/gallbladder flushing.citrus girl, I m forty, and married, My dad asks my hubby on the phone when he calls, if im out grazing around the yard, then he asks how i look and if im well…big grin, we will always be their babys no matter how far away we move or how old we get…patience, my friend and forgivness…then quiety go your own way.
I know I’ve given up trying to justify my raw diet to my mum. My dad cracks jokes about it, which is fine, because that’s in his nature. But, my mum just keeps making all these mean comments which are totally uncalled for. I’ve just stopped fighting back because I know she’s worrying about me. And I think a little part of it is jealousy. We’ve both always been on diets (despite her insistence that she doesn’t care what anyone thinks!), and she’s seeing how much weight I’m losing and how healthy I’m becoming and she’s jealous. She keeps making comments about my crazy “willpower”, when in truth, I really don’t miss cooked food. But, because she’s never tried it (and despite the odd sampling of what I prepare here and there) and never will, she’ll never understand that I don’t crave cookies and cakes and chocolate now. I’d much rather sit down with a bowl of fresh salsa or an ear of raw corn.
So, this isn’t so much advice as it is support. I know what you’re going through; just try not to take anything to heart. They really do love us.
Even before I went raw, my mom had issues with my choosing something different. After moving out of my parents’ house, I realized I felt better when I didn’t eat meat for every meal (may parents’ meals were centered around what kind of meat we would eat, and then find something else to go with it). So living on my own, I ate a little meat & cheese here and there, but I loved a pile of pasta with homemade (meatless) sauce & steamed veggies. I started creating my own foods. I moved back in with my parents later on, and my mom was offended that I didn’t want to slurp down her meat & cream of chicken everything. She said, “My food was always good enough for you BEFORE.” Even when I told her I felt better this way, she took it as a personal attack – then she took it as an attack on her diet, like I was telling her that her way of eating was wrong or bad, or that she was bad for eating it. That was not my intention AT ALL; it was her issue. I live with my parents again now, and she is now okay with how I eat, because she has let go of the personal issues and she sees how much better I feel when I eat the way I need to, versus when I don’t. She even tells me to do what I need to do, and to not worry about my siblings or others telling me I shouldn’t eat this way. We’ve come a long way in eleven years…
Gosh. lots of people have issues with this I guess! Sounds like in the end, most people adjust though. That’s how it has been with my family. I grew up with a nice size family, coming from a tiny southern cooking town in texas before moving to houston with them, we ate lots of pasta and meatsauce, and meat based or cheese based dishes(although, will hand it to my mom, salads and she tried to make it kind of healthy while pleasing my dad.) When I was 11 and eating chicken while driving by a field of cows, I put it down and said I am not going to eat meat anymore! and to everyones surprise, that was 8 years ago and I haven’t had any meat since. Anyway, all was cool til I went vegan 3 years later, and they decided that was too much and too difficult. Anyway, now its raw food and they don’t care:) My mom just tells me to chew my green smoothies She looked online and thats what she found, so it works great. All thats different is I only buy produce for our weekly shopping. Best wishes to everyone, people always tend to challenge what they don’t understand, so make sure they know why you are doing it and the benefits. Hope everyone finds peace for with their loved ones and raw food!:)
I hate talking to my parents about eating raw. Recently, when they were trying to get me to eat their granola, I said that I don’t eat processed grains. They didn’t hear that – they heard “I don’t eat grains”. My mother said “Oh, I wonder why THEY tell you not to eat grains”. I said “THEY don’t tell me anything, it’s my choice not to eat them”. I just don’t talk to them about what I eat anymore. Even keeping in mind that there’s a bit of history there, I just don’t want to defend myself anymore. I feel and look fantastic!!!
Amen to that!
hi citrusgirl, not sure how old you are, so i’ll just do my best here, bear with me :). I find parents are more resistant if you tell them, this is what i’m going to do, doing, etc. They don’t like to hear about sudden changes, they tend to think it is a “phase”, “fad” or by product of some social trauma. In other words, they become worry warts! I wouldn’t even discuss it with them… the more knowledge you throw at them, the more nervous for you they will get. Mostly I think, parents just worry about their kids starving to death! This feeling slowly starts kicking in around 50. Somewhere down the line, my mom turned into grandmom, always asking if i wanted something to eat, etc. After kids grow up, it seems that a lot of parents don’t know what else to offer children, except food! Just continue to eat what you please in front of them. Eat large plates of veggies with lots of variety, often and hopefully, when they see the large amounts of raw food you consume, they will realize that you won’t starve :)
karuna, I feel you :) I was diagnosed with celiac 8 years ago, and my dad asked me last week if i wanted a pretzel…..........uuuhhhhhhhhh!
I’m so glad that I got great responses from all of you : D Its nice to know that my heart isn’t going out there alone.
Tree Of Life, Thanks for the advice. I’m also planning to head out to California and pursue a major in computer sciences. Although I’ve been studying nutrition since I was about 12 (to resolve an acne issue) my parents don’t find my years of research evidence enough that I can handle a raw vegan lifestyle.
RawWayToHealth, Much appreciated for the link : D Its so hard to imagine that our country’s condition isn’t evidence enough that that the SAD diet isn’t the way to live.
DreamBrother, I believe the sperm count decrease was a result of the creation of high fructose corn syrup in 1950, just a theory. And yes i’ve had a few conditions that most raw foodist go under. My parents take it the wrong way when they see me break out or some more strands of hair fall out when i brush it, but the positive effects have definitely outweighed theses small negatives.
I deeply care for my parents. All of my love goes out to them, but I don’t have any interest in changing their way of living or butchering it, so does it seem right for them to do it? If my parents are dying to know why I chose this, they don’t need to read books or watch “Uncooking” shows on youtube. I’ll just tell them that I’ve been a omnivore and a herbivore, once they have gone through both lifestyles they can tell me what works. Don’t try to tell me what its like to fight in the war, if you haven’t fought in it.
Just a note for everyone and chicory,
I’m 17 for the record =D