Please Help

lolagirl24

-side note: If you're not up for reading my whole story, you can just skip to the last paragragh

Hi Everyone. I'm really happy to have found an awesome forum for people trying to pursue a raw-vegan lifestyle like me! I'm seventeen years old and I have been interested in nutrition for a good bit of time now. Last year, I lost 40lbs by finally taking hold of my life and getting myself to a healthy weight (I was 160 at first and I'm average height for a girl). After I got to a healthy weight, the stress from school really picked up, I was in the midst of some emotional family issues, my friends stopped hanging out with me because I never wanted to have junk food involved when we hung out, and then to top it off, my boyfriend dumped me. (Not that any of this is his fault at all, but at the time being single really didn't help my situation). I became really depressed and then started really restricting my calories. I lost even more weight and people started to worry about me. After being in therapy for a while, I overcame the habits of calorie restriction about 4 months ago, and started to focus more on making sure I was getting what my body needed and caring more about the earth and sustainability. That's when I decided to go vegan.

As this school year started, the stress kicked in, I find myself being depressed again and I have completely lost control of myself. I've started binge eating on everything that doesn't contain animal products. I've tried SO many things (praying, having others hide food from me, putting up posters, tieing my hands, making sure I get at least 8hrs of sleep and plenty of water everyday) yet i find myself binging almost every day now. I did have one week where I was raw-vegan, and I loved it. I felt amazing, energized, and I my skin was amazingly clear. Ever since that one week I have been trying to start my raw-veganism lifestyle up again, but my binge-eating habits keep getting in the way. I'm 132lbs now, but I honestly feel just as bad as I did before I lost all the weight last year. Please help me. 

kaelin

Hello sweetie. Ur story sounds very simular to mine. Except I exersised myself into the ground! Im trying to remember what helped at that tome i. My life and i really cant remember. I think it was time... Going to college where there so many other interests that school was not the only focus. And take a breath my young friend. You are doing awesomee in life and as a person. Give faith in time and love. If you bing on veggies it will be okay. Know your doing just great. Keep your chin up, take a breath, hug youself. Your friend. Kaelin

lolagirl24

Thanks Kaelin, you're sweet. It took a lot of courage for me to post that and your response was really inspiring. I can't wait for college, except besides healing myself, I want nothing more than to study holistic nutrition and sustainibility in a warm place with people like myself. Sadly, even with my grades, I feel like that will never happen since I live in the North and out-of-state tutition is actually insane. 

lolagirl24

Thanks Claire, ya I read up on residency rules for most states.. but to be honest, I almost feel like I shouldn't focus on it so much right now. I think I really just need to heal. How does one do this while in school? (constantly surrounded by others eating junk all the time and never gaining a pound, peer pressure, all that stuff) I'm seeing one therapist right now who I like but with my schedule and how many patitents she has I only get to see her once every two weeks at best.