I know I’ve been posting a lot lately, but I’ve just been trying to harmonize my body by experimenting with different ideas, as well as perhaps being a little overly inquisitive.
Transitioning to this lifestyle has been so hard, so hard. I never expected it would be this hard. I know for some going raw has been relatively easy, I’m quite envious of that, for I want nothing more than to actually be raw and enjoy all the benefits. I think my dysfunctional relationship with food is the main cause of the difficulty in successfully becoming raw, for me.
I think I may be doing too much at once. I jumped right into this, determined to be as raw as I could get…
I haven’t been able to stick with it for too long. I guess being primarily raw is too drastic for me. Many have suggested transitioning slowly, by continuing to eat some cooked food. I’ve been reluctant to do this because I’m stubborn and a perfectionist. I sort of have an “all or nothing” mind state: I’m either all raw or I’m eating junk food (and feeling awful).
I’d like to be able to experience all the benefits of raw foods… the weight loss, the energy, the vitality, the invigoration, the contentment, et cetera. I’ve got myself thinking that if I’m not 100% raw that I’m going to be deprived of these… wonders. I’ve already been disappointed too many times by the different alterations I’ve made to my lifestyle in an attempt to feel better. I’m afraid that even if I’m 80% that it’s not going to be enough… to help.
This diet hasn’t worked for me so far because I’ve felt sick and because I’ve felt deprived. It’s been hard for me to sever my attachment to certain foods, foods that I’ve grown up loving. I’m not saying that I would be unwilling to remove these foods from my diet; but going from foods with intricate flavors, warm foods, eclectic foreign foods, etc, to handfuls of grapes and salads, has just been tough. And I used to love to cook. Being the only vegetarian in my family, I learned to cook for myself. I would make homemade pizzas, making the dough from scratch, with mushrooms and courgettes and asparagus and goats cheese; I would make dishes of Ethiopian and Indian cuisine (being my favorite); I would make blueberry muffins, with extra blueberries… I feel sad thinking that I could never have a blueberry muffin again, even if there’s a delicious alternative. But, I’ve often heard that people who have been raw end up preferring the raw alternatives and no longer crave the cooked foods they once loved. I haven’t tried very many raw recipes yet. The ones I have tried I have either been extremely disgusted with or have felt extremely nauseated after eating… so, you can imagine why I’m so discouraged. Since, I’ve been trying to keep it simple by eating green smoothies, fruit, and salad. Which has been satisfying yet unvarying (so I feel slightly unenthused and deprived).
Okay, here’s my whole point: I need to allow myself some leniency. I would like to know what I can expect health-wise if I were to aim for, say, 80%-90% raw? I was thinking I would eat all raw except for maybe one cooked meal, and store-bought salad dressing. I know I could try to make some raw salad dressing, but the ones I’ve tried I haven’t been impressed with and I often don’t have all the ingredients to make a good tasting dressing… and I need some thing a little zestier than just olive oil and lemon. And, what should I try to eat when I eat cooked? What types of foods would be the best? Obviously, vegetables and fruits, but what could I do with those vegetables and fruits, how should I prepare them? And, I was wondering if any one knew where to find some good Vegan salad dressings, particularly, Ranch. Is there a Vegan salad dressing manufacturer, you know like “Kraft” or “Hidden Valley,” some sort of name I could look for in the stores? I’m assuming that these salad dressing are going to have soy. The salad dressing would top my greens, so they would be in small amounts; this isn’t so bad, right?
Ah. Another long post. My apologies. This has just been so hard for me so far. But I really hope to be successful with this, and to one day be able to say that I’m raw and healthy. I also hope to eventually UNcook more raw foods, but for right now, I