Spinning out of Control

edited December 2010 in Being Raw

If there is anyone out there with any words of wisdom, support or insight, I am in great need of some right now…..or know where I should go or who I should talk to…

I hit a hard time in my life. I was 80% raw and at my healthiest until I was blindsided by infidelity in my marriage which led to a painful divorce.I also recently had a miscarriage that weighed heavy on me. I think I may need psychological help but I can’t bring myself to do it yet. Upon separating, I moved and immediately began eating a SAD diet and smoking. I began a pattern of utter self destruction. I know I need to change and fix my life but I can’t seem to find the power within myself to take any steps to make things better. I feel trapped and crippled by circumstance. I am out of work and I live on food stamps and have found it hard to eat raw on food stamps. I moved back with my grandma and lost all my raw food prep stuff. I know I need to do something but I can’t seem to find the motivation. I have already involved myself in a new serious relationship and he has no interest in becoming healthy. How do I stop this self destructive pattern? What do you guys do to keep pressing on? How do I get back into the right mindset? I think I am so depressed that i don’t care about anything anymore and when I do care, I feel like I don’t have the means to help myself.

Any advice?

Comments

  • I’d say take it slow. it’s taken me over ten years to come back from a bad relationship, drug addiction, SAD eating, etc.

    I am sorry you lost it all. If it helps, I “lost it all” and spun out of control for a few years there before it all came back into focus about one year ago and I started taking care of myself. I started by quitting cigarettes and fasting. It’s easy to fast when you’re broke, it costs nothing!

    I hope you feel better, sorry I couldn’t be of more help

    EDIT: remember, any step you take is a step towards life. Don’t give up, keep kicking and struggling towards that serenity!!

  • Rawradisouras! Please don’t give up on yourself! You deserve better than to be depressed and unhealthy. You do need to get some help. You’ve been through some traumatic events and it’s important that you learn to heal. I would also confront your partner about how you’re feeling and ask him to be supportive of you. That should help and if he’s a good one he’ll want you to feel your best. OF course, don’t pressure him into doing it. That will only push him away.

    Please take care of yourself! You’re a precious human being courageous enough to call out for help. I hope people have good words of wisdom to help you.

  • I really second what TJAB said. I think getting help right now is your number 1 priority. You are going through a highly stressful time and need support. As they say, “one step at a time.” A good therapist or counselor can help you get to the core of your feelings and help you prioritize things in your life. Check for places in your area that offer low cost counseling services or even check with you local church/synagogue to see if they can refer you somewhere. As you get other things together, it will be easier to focus on adding raw foods back to your life and quitting smoking. Don’t overwhelm yourself with doing too much at once right now. Hang in there!

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