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Rationally un-raw...

What a disaster! I discovered raw foods and was very, very excited to make the transition and experience all the wondrous benefits. Then, after a few days of raw, my urges and logicality inexplicably transformed into this insuppressible food-crazy monster. I began eating gross, junk food and just gross food in general… things I didn’t even want to eat, I would eat, because I couldn’t help myself for some reason. I’ve been struggling and struggling to slap myself out of it and get back on raw. I even seemed to have gained some weight through this catastrophe, which I am infuriated about. I’ve been feeling so terrible and repulsive. Just yuck. As determined as I am, I can’t seem to get myself together. And unfortunately, I’ve come to the conclusion that the raw-mentality is to blame. I just simply can’t do it… right now. I want to, I really want to, I really, really want to… but I’ve proven to myself, repeatedly, that I’m not capable of being emotionally, mentally, and physically satisfied by this diet. I mean, certain parts of me love this diet… I have noticed that the more raw, fresh, unaltered foods I eat, the better I feel… but a big part of me feels deprived and bored. I’m sure if I had the patience to make all the elaborate, scrumptious-looking raw meals, that I wouldn’t have this issue with perceived deprivation, however, I don’t have the patience required for the preparation and I just end up eating formulaic, monotonous things that irritate and mock the glutton within me. I plan to still eat high raw… but in addition, I’ll have to eat some cooked and soy. I’m too dependent on cooked foods… I’m too dependent on the cooking process, the warmth, the variety, etc. I have resolved to eat Vegan and to eat largely raw… but I think I do need some cooked and I would like to have some soy yogurt (which is something I used to eat as dessert, pre-raw. I’d eat yogurt with fresh fruit, and that would be my sweet-fix.) The soy yogurt will be the only soy thing in my diet, aside from perhaps occasional salad dressing. Every thing else I eat will be fresh fruit and vegetables (whether I cook them or eat them raw), and fresh grains (organic quinoa, maybe some oat groats or rolled oats, etc), and I was thinking Manna and/or Ezekiel bread. I just hate what I’ve been doing to myself, and I think I need my diet to be more stable and I need to be more consistent with it and I need to cut myself some slack. It just became so apparent to me that being primarily raw is unrealistic, for right now. I have confidence that I will get more raw as I go along, and I still fully intend to be raw as much as I can.

I just wanted to let everyone know how much I appreciate you all. I am so grateful for this community. And I am so happy to have discovered raw, even if being raw is some thing I may not be fully capable of at this time. I’ve tried my hardest. I guess I just can’t put my whole heart into it right now. But I’d like to think that I’m a little closer. I just love every one of you, and I admire you all so much, and I’m just so… appreciative. Thank you for your support.

Comments

  • bittbitt Raw Starter

    yes it does seem like it wasn’t quit the right time for you for you to change all at once. focus on having less processed foods and maybe making one fun raw meal a week until you have a repertoire to select from. it’s hard to get through the first week or so because you don’t feel all the great energy yet that raw will give you quite yet. try adding some juices or green smoothies. honestly for me the other raw foods are just filler and these are the things that give me the best health benefits.

    take care of yourself. and take it one day at a time. sometimes it can be scary to think of a whole diet change. just wake up and take each day as it comes.

    I also recommend you watch the vlog on bunny berry’s blog. she talks a lot about the emotional parts of the diet. http://bunnyberry.blogspot.com/

  • have_merseyhave_mersey Raw Newbie

    YOU PROBABLY DETOXED TOO FAST> ALSO YOU MIGHT LOOK INTO CANDIDA YEAST OVERGROWTH

    SORRY ABOUT CAPS MY KEYBOARD IS MALFUNCTIONING SO I THINK I”LL REBOOT IN A MINUTE>

  • stylistchickstylistchick Raw Newbie

    food addiction, i struggle with it too. night time is the worst for me for some reason. maybe you need to hit ” rock bottom” so to speak.

  • I had a similar experience this past winter. I had been almost totally raw since spring but I was really missing the warmth and aroma of cooked food. My husband is open to raw and is vegan but my kids are vegetarian and not very interested in giving up cooked food. I was having to prepare my raw meal and then their cooked food and it was torture and exhausting. I ended up being frustrated and feeling deprived. I gave up almost completely on raw for a time and I also ate foods I would never have touched before, and I thought I really wanted, but they ended up making me feel heavy and bloated and tired. I became very discouraged and wished it were easier. Then a friend of mine gave me a Domino magazine because it had an article on raw foods and she knew I was into that. The article was titled “Raw Until Dinner”. It was simple advice for people wanting to transition and it gave me the inspiration I needed to get back on track. I thought, “raw until dinner, I can do that!” I started out like this. I would eat yummy raw foods during the day and prepare one vegan cooked meal in the evening. Giving myself permission to compromise helped me to get out of that “all or nothing” way of thinking that had been my downfall. I now eat the cooked part of our dinner with my family only a couple nights a week. Taking the pressure off gave me the ability to be more creative in my raw/cooked dinners so that there was something for everyone to be happy with. I hope my experience helps you and I do not think you should feel guilty for eating sprouted breads and cooked veggies and whole grains. Take it easy on yourself, enjoy your food just don’t let it be the center of your life.

  • TomsMomTomsMom Raw Newbie

    There’s nothing to feel bad about, hon. There is no failure, here. OOXX

  • ZoeZoe Raw Newbie

    You haven’t failed, you are at the beginning of a journey. Just take it as fast as the slowest part of yourself and you’ll get to wherever you need to in time. Even if it takes 10 years, who cares. It is important that you enjoy your life and change at your own pace.

    I don’t think being just raw is enough. People need spiritual, emotional, mental and physical support from other things to make this possible/easy. Personally I use all kinds of self development tools and did way before I even knew what raw was. If it wasn’t for these things, I doubt I would have made it.

  • TomsMomTomsMom Raw Newbie

    Well said, Zoe!

  • ZanzibarrrZanzibarrr Raw Newbie

    yes, nothing to add really.

  • You are definitely not alone. I just wrote a post about this in my blog

    rawmelanie.blogspot.com

  • This happened to me too. I went raw practically overnight, It was easy for a few months until I had a family member in the hospital far from home and I was living out of a hotel room eating horrible hospital salads. Yes, they were awful….sort of ironic, I know. After his death I could care less what I ate as long as it was vegan. Now that I have planted a garden for the summer I am excited to begin incorporating more raw meals beyond my basic fruits, salads, and smoothies. Just do as much as you can and you’ll get there, this lifestyle is not easy when we are surrounded by fast food chains, commercials and people with bad eating habits. I grow tired sometimes justifying my lifestyle to others. It’s completely unavoidable when you live and work in the main stream. I like to lead by example and I think that is what keeps me going. Recently, I had a friend that had horrible headaches and skin lesions. I simply suggested she try eliminating dairy to get some relief. AND IT WORKED! She is feeling much better now and I’m so glad she was open to my conversations with her. This type of result makes the knowledge of raw so powerful to me and I’m grateful to learn all I can so I can help others.

  • jsorensens2jsorensens2 Raw Jr. Superstar

    sanprecario – Wow, how cool that there was an article “Raw Until Dinner.” I have come to that conclusion for myself – breakfast and lunch are easy, dinner is harder especially when I have a SAD eating family and I do the cooking. I eat raw until dinner, and then I make a choice based upon a variety of reasons at dinner time. It’s working well for me!

    rawbeginner – I just try to eat as healthy as my mood takes me, but if I don’t eat perfectly I don’t beat myself up about it. You are right, this is an amazingly supportive community! Everyone is in it together to better ourselves, at our own pace and in our own style! Eating one piece of raw anything each day is probably more than a lot of people eat, huh? Baby steps.

    Zoe – I couldn’t agree with you more. So many components of my life had to be in line so that eating raw would fit.

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